The year was 1994, and I was a bright-eyed sophomore majoring in Political Science and Asian Studies when the Clinton Administration signed the Agreed Framework with North Korea. It was a simple plan. North Korea would remain party to the Non-Proliferation Treaty (i.e. it would not develop a bomb), and it would submit to an IAEA inspection regime to ensure compliance. In return, the U.S. would pony-up heating oil and economic aid so the North Koreans wouldn't freeze or starve to death, and we would pledge not to attack them with nuclear weapons so they wouldn't turn to ash and blow away or glow in the dark with permanent orange afros.

Things were about as normal as they could be when dealing with North Korea until 2003 when the Bush Administration - fresh off of declaring North Korea's membership in the Axis of Evil - decided it would try to out-crazy Kim Jong Il, and flushed the Clinton-era framework down the toilet like a Koran in Camp X-ray(no credible evidence, my ass). North Korea promptly withdrew from the NPT. Thus began Bush's post-Iraq foreign policy Big Top Adventure/damage control operation now known as the Six-Party Talks. The plan was to partner with everyone else in the neighborhood - South Korea, Japan, Russia, and China - and pressure the North into ceasing production of weaponized nuclear materials. By last October - after multiple breakdowns, false-starts, and a rousing game of slap-ass and touch-dick - North Korea had successfully tested its first nuclear weapon.

Today, after several years of unmitigated failure, the Bush Administration is declaring victory. Apparently its first in any arena (what, no banner?). The new agreement is much better than the Clinton-era framework, and has the official BushCo seal of awesomeness! In the new deal the North Koreans get even more oil and more aid than before, and the added bonus of normalized relations with the U.S. which allows all kinds of money to be made by multinational corporations on both sides of the crazy curtain. In return, the U.S. gets the international inspectors we used to have before the 2003 bout of uncontrolled diplomatic diarrhea and vomiting re-admitted to North Korean nuclear facilities. Oh, and they have the bomb.

So yeah...breathe deep and taste that victory. Thanks again, George.

Labels: Kim Jong Il, North Korea